Saturday, September 1, 2012

Taking Eminem's "Til I Collapse" a little too seriously...

So... The other night I was just beginning my run when my blade caught on the sidewalk.  Normally, when this happens I recover with a small hop on my good foot, and resume my pace.  This time I think I was running to fast, and I lost my balance and slammed to the ground on my good knee.  Note to Dave: Yes actually, it is possible to fall with a prosthetic that does not have a knee.  I fell right in front of a seminary, and in front of an older couple walking by.  Neither one even acknowledged me or asked if I was ok.  (Mind you I'm bleeding on the ground.  It totally made me think of "The Good Samaritan" parable.  Not saying these people are going to hell or anything... but I dunno... sounds like bad karma might be comin their way. Ha. Maybe they'll think twice the next time they step over a bleeding, one-legged girl. :P)  And to be clear: I love Grey' Anatomy.  I really do.  I can watch surgery on television and eat dinner at the same time.  But something about blood in person... ugh.  So NOT my thing.  Anyways...I got up, put Eminem's "Til I Collapse" on, and kept going.  Not gonna lie, it felt kinda hard-core to run down the streets on Chicago sweating, breathing hard and bleeding :) 

I have really tried to put the fall behind me.  But I noticed that I'm holding back quite a bit when i run now.  I'm afraid to look up, and instead am looking at the placement of my blade with every stride (which... for those who run know... kills motivation...).  It's so much easier when you are focusing on a point in front of you, and running with the intent on making it there.  I'm working on the intrapersonal /psychological aspect of running  (surprise surprise huh? more processing... go figure).  I started thinking about this a few weeks ago when Dave told me that I was being way too critical of myself.  I've always been very hard on myself, and need to learn to be present in the moment, be happy with where I am and celebrate the small achievements.    My goals with running have changed a bit. I'm focusing less on running as hard and fast as I can, and more on taking my time, walking when I need to, and putting in more distance.  

I FINALLY hot my 2 mile mark tonight, which was a huge accomplishment for me.  I walked a bit of it, but I was ok with that.  I'm getting there. Two weeks til the 5K... and feeling much better about it. :)



First fall battle wound. Ok. It looks tiny.  But please throw yourself at full speed on your knees on concrete and tell me how you feel.

Yup. Rocking Hello Kitty. 

First 2 miler! 

Screenshot...  Ok... So it took me a while. But I did it. (Insert "Meaghan Squeal")

1 comment:

  1. What can I say, but you are a rock star my dear. Love that you are keeping that sense of humor. Without that you are done! And you are far from vein done. Actually you just are getting started. I love it! Keep the post a coming and you can insert a squeal for me. mama cusack loves you, schmoop!

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